Yes. All of this. I’m so sorry that you have experienced the deep wounds of “neutrality”. It makes you feel crazy on top of everything else. In my own story I have taken such comfort in the stories of God in the OT. They used to scare me, but realizing that God was holy and had no tolerance for sin, and especially no tolerance for abuse, made such a difference. No matter how people handled things or didn’t, they could not take away the fact that God sees and knows and cares. The inability of churches and Christians to look this scourge in the eye and call abusers to accountability is (I think) one of the biggest reasons that people leave faith altogether. It is a deep, gaping wound that needs to be tended.
I’m so sorry that you have a story like mine ♥️ You really do feel like you’re going crazy, but like you I’ve taken such comfort in the Old Testament. For me, the imprecatory psalms have ministered to me in such strange but encouraging ways—to know that God is okay with our anger in the midst of our abuse is such a balm.
And I think you’re right about people leaving the church—because of all people, Christians should be taking the strongest stance against abuse. I’m grateful for my church and how they have. But outside of my church, it’s been believers who have taken such a neutral position while nonbelievers around me have raged at what has happened.
I experienced this in church too. I haven’t gone back. My child’s father still goes and is actively involved. It made me wonder- how often has the church chosen a brother in Christ over a sister for everything in the essay? Once would be too many.
I know exactly what you mean as I’m in a similar position—it makes you feel as if all that happened was no big deal. I’m so sorry you’ve experienced this too ♥️
There’s so much here that’s so good. I mean, all of it’s good, Lara. I’m always blindsided by the way people react to abuse, even when they do believe the abuse happens.
And… I should just text you about it 🤍 Love you and pray for you so often!
Thank you so much for putting this into words. I’m currently reading Armies of Enablers on this very topic. It’s legally technical, but this attorney is advocating for laws that penalize enablers. Highly recommend.
Such good words, Lara. Thank you for bravely sharing your experience and what’s on your heart. Neutrality combined with the, “Well, I know they did ____ but at least they didn’t ____” or “I know they ____ but don’t forget they ____” causes so much further damage.
Yes. All of this. I’m so sorry that you have experienced the deep wounds of “neutrality”. It makes you feel crazy on top of everything else. In my own story I have taken such comfort in the stories of God in the OT. They used to scare me, but realizing that God was holy and had no tolerance for sin, and especially no tolerance for abuse, made such a difference. No matter how people handled things or didn’t, they could not take away the fact that God sees and knows and cares. The inability of churches and Christians to look this scourge in the eye and call abusers to accountability is (I think) one of the biggest reasons that people leave faith altogether. It is a deep, gaping wound that needs to be tended.
I’m so sorry that you have a story like mine ♥️ You really do feel like you’re going crazy, but like you I’ve taken such comfort in the Old Testament. For me, the imprecatory psalms have ministered to me in such strange but encouraging ways—to know that God is okay with our anger in the midst of our abuse is such a balm.
And I think you’re right about people leaving the church—because of all people, Christians should be taking the strongest stance against abuse. I’m grateful for my church and how they have. But outside of my church, it’s been believers who have taken such a neutral position while nonbelievers around me have raged at what has happened.
I experienced this in church too. I haven’t gone back. My child’s father still goes and is actively involved. It made me wonder- how often has the church chosen a brother in Christ over a sister for everything in the essay? Once would be too many.
I know exactly what you mean as I’m in a similar position—it makes you feel as if all that happened was no big deal. I’m so sorry you’ve experienced this too ♥️
I'm so sorry this happened to you, Lara.
Thank you, friend ♥️
There’s so much here that’s so good. I mean, all of it’s good, Lara. I’m always blindsided by the way people react to abuse, even when they do believe the abuse happens.
And… I should just text you about it 🤍 Love you and pray for you so often!
So, so grateful for you and your encouragement, dear friend ♥️
Thank you so much for putting this into words. I’m currently reading Armies of Enablers on this very topic. It’s legally technical, but this attorney is advocating for laws that penalize enablers. Highly recommend.
https://armiesofenablers.com/
Such good words, Lara. Thank you for bravely sharing your experience and what’s on your heart. Neutrality combined with the, “Well, I know they did ____ but at least they didn’t ____” or “I know they ____ but don’t forget they ____” causes so much further damage.
I’m so sorry , Lara. Thank you for your courage to speak up 🙏❤️🩹.