Theological Discernment Is for Moms Too

For the mom who feels ill-equipped to discern all the resources out there for her children.

As a new mom, at times, I felt like I was drowning in decisions. Soothers or no soothers? Cloth diapers or disposable? Baby-led weaning or purees? Homeschooling or public school? But what overwhelmed me more as I held my sleeping baby was the thought of the need for theological discernment ahead of me. A lump grew in my throat as I wondered how I would protect my baby from the false gospels he’d encounter as he grew. How would I show him the difference between the one true God and the many idols he’d face? 

Perhaps the thought of theological discernment puts a lump in your throat too. Perhaps it seems like more work and more reasons to fear. Perhaps it’s an unfamiliar or confusing idea. Charles Spurgeon has said that discernment is the skill of seeing what is right from almost right. It’s the ability to recognize the truth about God and the gospel and recognize when it’s skewed. It’s one thing to do that for ourselves, it’s another to guide our children through it as well. 

Sister, let me encourage you that theological discernment doesn’t need to be intimidating. This may be a weighty task, but it’s also an honor we’ve been given as mothers in teaching and loving our families.

A Theological Legacy

As parents, we often pass on what we’re passionate about to our children—such as the sports we enjoy or the food we like. When it comes to our doctrine, our beliefs about God and his commands, what will we pass along? As moms, we have been given the opportunity to place solid, foundational rocks in our children’s understanding of God. We get to equip our children for good works and prepare them for suffering. We get to hand down the comforting truths of the gospel and the character of God—truths that have made deep impressions on our own hearts. What an honor! 

We want to feed our little ones with God’s word rightly handled. With so many decisions to make as a mom, it can be tempting to simply buy whichever book or children’s Bible looks the cutest. Instead, we can imitate the Bereans who, “received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily,” to see if the teachings of Paul and Silas were true (Acts 17:11). As we seek a church to attend we can consider not only how this church will feed us as believers, but how it will help build on the truths of the gospel we are teaching our children at home. Rather than only considering the activities that will be offered, we can consider what truths the ministry will be building in our children. These are just two of the opportunities we have to shape our children’s theology.

Baby Steps in Discernment

Perhaps discernment seems intimidating because you feel ill-equipped. Maybe you didn’t attend seminary or a Christian college. Maybe you didn’t grow up in the church and you’re slowly learning these things yourself. Sister, you are still able to exercise discernment because you have the Holy Spirit. Every believer is given the Holy Spirit to dwell in them, and he will help us understand the word and apply it (John 16:13; 1 John 2:20, 27). As we hide the word away in our hearts, he will help us see truth from near-truth and near-truth from falsehood. Being a discerning mother begins by simply putting our faith in Christ. 

Reading and studying our Bibles is another step towards discernment. Scripture tells us what’s true and necessary for salvation and even shows us what distortions of it look like. The most necessary truth we need to understand is spread across the entire Bible: the gospel. Jesus Christ, the second person of the Godhead, died on the cross to satisfy the wrath of the Father against the sins of his people that we may receive eternal life by faith. We see both glimpses and perfect retellings of this truth over and over again in the Bible, and we need to apply it over and over again in our lives.

We should also be sitting under solid teaching from a gospel-centered local church. In doing so, we surround ourselves with fellow brothers and sisters who are called to help keep us and our children on track. When we’re unsure or we feel discouraged, we can turn to them to help carry us along and guide us. We can ask our church leaders for guidance in choosing good resources for our families. And we can entrust our children to their ministries knowing they will be taught true doctrine. 

Restful Discernment

Although it involves intention and effort, discernment can come from a place of rest, not hustle or terror. God has done the work of laying out truth and knowledge in his word and filling us with the Holy Spirit. Just as God has worked in our lives, that same work of change our children need is in his hands too. While we teach and discern, we can rest knowing that the major work of heart change isn’t our responsibility but God’s. 

So as we seek to protect our children from false teaching, we aren’t left to aimlessly hope for the best. Instead, we can rest confidently in God’s word and the Holy Spirit as we exercise discernment each day in motherhood. The greater work of salvation is his, and we find rest as we rely on his power.

Another version of this originally appeared on Risen Motherhood.